Kupyolera mwa zaka masauzande ambiri asanakhalepo, malemba a anthu oganiza kwambiri za ubongo amabwera. Ndipo, ngakhale kusintha kumene dziko lathu lakhala likuchitika, mawu a akatswiri achifilosofi akadalibe oyenera. Mwachitsanzo, ndondomeko ya kudzikonda kuchokera ku chithunzi cha Aristotle woganiza bwino, yemwe amakhulupirira kuti kudzikonda sikuli payekha, koma kwakukulu kuposa momwe chiyenera kukhalira, kukula kwa chikondi ichi. Chiphunzitso cha egoism chili ndi zotsutsana zambiri. Anthu ena amaona kuti kudzikonda kukhala khalidwe labwino, khalidwe lofunika kuti munthu akhale ndi chimwemwe, ena amakhulupirira kuti kudzikonda kumangobweretsa mavuto okhaokha. Kutsutsana kumeneku kumatha kutchulidwa momveka bwino m'mawu olembedwa ndi malemba okhudzana ndi egoism. Epictetus analemba kuti kuchita zonse payekha sikukutanthauza kuchita motsutsana ndi ubwino wamba. Thackeray, mbali inayo, ankakhulupirira kuti pazoipa zonse zomwe zimanyozetsa munthu, kudzikonda ndiko koipitsitsa komanso kosayenera. Kusemphana kwa lingaliro la egoism likugogomezedwa pofotokoza za Ambrose Bierce: "The egoist ndi munthu woipa kukoma, wodzikonda kwambiri kuposa iyeyo kuposa ine." Ndipo apa pali ndondomeko yokhudza kudzikonda kwa Yermolova, pomwe mzere pakati pa nzeru zowonongeka ndi chiwonongeko chodzikonda chimachokera: "Aliyense amachita zonse chifukwa cha yekha. Amodzi okha payekha ndalama zawo kwa ena ndipo mwina safuna, ndipo ena mwa iwo okha amawononga ena ndi zinazake sangathe. "
"Wathanzi" ndi "wodwala" wodzikonda
Aphorisms samangosonyeza kuti umoyo waumwini ndi wofunika kwambiri, amatsindikanso kuchuluka kwa matanthawuzo omwe timayika mu lingaliro la kudzikonda. Funso limeneli limakhala ndi gawo lalikulu pa moyo wathu wonse. Kuwonetsa malingaliro a kudzikonda ndi kudzikonda, mukhoza kuwononga umunthu kapena kuyambitsa kukana kuthamanga kwa "I" wake, ndikukwaniritsa zotsatira zake zosiyana. Kuyambira ubwana timaphunzitsidwa kuti kudzikonda ndi chiyeso, ndipo chikhalidwe chaumunthu chili ndi katundu wotero monga kuopa kuoneka zoipa pamaso pa ena. Potero, chida chogwiritsira ntchito chiri chokonzeka. Mwina munthu amachita zomwe akufuna kuchokera kwa iye, kapena amatchedwa "egoist". Mwanayo amamvetsetsa mwamsanga momwe angagwiritsire ntchito, ndipo malingana ndi makhalidwe ake amakhalanso wogonjetsa kapena wozunzidwa. Akukula, akupitiriza kuchita zinthu motsatira chitsanzo cha khalidwe lomwe adakula kuyambira ali mwana. Malingana ndi malingaliro oikapo amamanga ubale m'banja, amaphunzitsa bwino ana. Koma chiyani pamapeto? Ngati mwanayo akukhala wothandizira, ndiye kuti ndizofunsana za chiwonongeko choopsa. Amakwaniritsa zolinga zake pogwiritsa ntchito ena, osasamala konse za maganizo awo pazochita zake. Anthu oterewa alibe malire a kudzikonda, sakhala ndi nkhawa ndi okondedwa awo, ndipo chifukwa chake amakhala okha kapena amakhala ndi anthu omwe amadana nawo. Ngati mwanayo atenga udindo wa wozunzidwa, ndiye kuti nthawi zambiri amakhala wopusa, koma osati chifukwa cha chikondi kwa anzako, koma chifukwa choopa kukhumudwitsa. Anthu oterewa amalowa mumagulu a anthu osokoneza bongo, ndipo amagwiritsa ntchito moyo wawo kumenyana nthawi zonse pakati pa kumva kuti ali ndi mlandu, ndipo amayesa kuletsa umunthu wawo. Anthu oterewa amatha kugonjera m'manja mwa anthu osokoneza bongo, koma akulowa m'gulu limene palibe amene akuyesera kuwaletsa, amadzimvera, amakwiya komanso amachitira nkhanza.
Kotero pali chinthu chonga uzimu wabwino wa munthu. Kudzikonda koteroko kumatanthauza kudzikonda nokha ndi kudzidera nkhawa, koma kumvetsetsa ndi kulemekeza ena. Zosangalatsa zoterezi sizidzachita chilichonse chokondweretsa wogwiritsira ntchito, koma ngati awona kuti ndizofunikira, amathandizira moona mtima popanda kuyembekezera kuti avomereze popanda mantha. Kugonana kwabwino kumagwirizanitsa ndi kudzikonda, koma sikunaphatikizapo nsembe, yomwe imabweretsa kuwonongeka kwa mkati. Kugonjera kwa "wozunzidwa" ndiko kubweretsa mavuto ndi kuzunzika chifukwa cha ena. Kuchita zinthu zodzikongoletsa kwabwino kumatanthauza ntchito zokondweretsa nokha komanso kwa ena. Katswiri wathanzi wathanzi akhoza kukhala wopondereza komanso wogwidwa ndi vuto, koma ngati azindikira kuti ali ndi khalidwe lopanda khalidwe labwino. Komanso, mawonetseredwe a egoism mwa amuna ndi akazi ndi osiyana, ndipo chifukwa chake, njira zothetsera kudzikonda zidzakhala zosiyana. Kumvetsa,
Musachotseratu kudzikonda. Kukhala wodzisunga wodalirika n'kofunikira kwa munthu kuti akhale ndi moyo wathunthu ndi kukwaniritsa zolinga zake. Kuti muteteze kusankha kwanu ndi malingaliro anu, koma panthawi yomweyi kulemekeza ndikuzindikira malingaliro ndi kusankha kwa anthu ena ndizosiyana ndi zokwanira za egoism.