Kodi mungasunge bwanji banja?

Aliyense wamunthu amamvetsa kuti popanda kutsutsana, kusagwirizana ndi kutemberera, palibe banja limodzi limene silingathe kuchita. Koma zimachitika kuti kusokonezeka kwazing'ono kumachepetsetsa ubwino wa banja ndikupitirirabe mpaka mmodzi wa okwatirana atengeka ndipo safuna kuti asudzulane. Kotero bwanji kuti musagwirizane nazo zoterezi, momwe mungasunge chikondi muukwati?

Kodi ndikoyenera kusunga ukwati?

Pamene maubwenzi muukwati sichibweretsanso chisangalalo, funso la momwe angasunge ukwati ndilo maziko. Pambuyo pa zonse, chinachake chinakusungani nthawi yochuluka kwambiri, sizingatheke kuti zonsezi zitheke. Koma musanayambe ntchito mukugwedeza ming'alu mu moyo wanu wa banja, muyenera kudzifunsa nokha funso, koma kodi mukufunika kusunga ukwati? Chifukwa pali zinthu zomwe zimapangitsa kuti mwamuna akhalebe ndi moyo. Nthawi zonsezi ndi zosiyana: wina sangathe kukhululukira ena, wina sangathe kukhala ndi mwamuna yemwe sangakwanitse kupereka ndalama, ndipo wina sasowa mwamuna, kusoweka nthawi zonse kuntchito, zomwe ana nthawi zambiri amajambula onani kuposa kunyumba. Dzifunseni nokha ngati mutha kugwirizanitsa ndi maonekedwe a wokwatirana kapena mwafika kale pamphepete momwe simudzasokonekera.

Kawirikawiri akazi amanena kuti amakhala ndi amuna awo chifukwa cha ana. Kotero simukusowa-mwanayo, ndithudi, abambo amafunika, koma makolo amanyansi, kuzizira, kulemekeza m'banja komanso zina zoipa sizidzachita konse. Ganizirani momwe zidzakhalira ngati mwanayo atangoyamba kubadwa amangozungulira zoipa zokhazokha. Mukhoza kutchula kuti mwanayo samachoka, ndipo amakhala ndi mwamuna wake. Koma izi sizitsutsano - pali achibale amene angakuthandizeni, ndipo inuyo nokha simuli ndi mphamvu. Khalani ozunza nokha ndi mwanayo ndalama (osati panobe kuti mwamuna wake abweretsa kunyumba, osati kwa mbuye wake) - si zabwino.

Kodi mungapulumutse bwanji banja mukatha kugulitsidwa kwa mwamuna wawo?

Kwa amayi ena, kusakhulupirika kwa mnzanuyo sikovomerezeka, ndipo ngati atadziwa za "mapulogalamu" a mwamuna "otsala", ndiye kuti pempho la chisudzulo limaperekedwa mwamsanga. Ndipo amayi ena amaganiza momwe angapulumutsire ukwati pambuyo pa kupandukira, chifukwa amakonda mwamuna wake ndipo ali okonzeka kumukhululukira chirichonse. Koma kusunga ubale pambuyo polakwika koteroko kumakhala pamapewa a onse awiri.

1. Kulankhulana kulikonse ndi mbuyeyo kuyenera kuyima. Amuna ena omwe ali ndi misonzi m'maso mwao amanena kuti winayo, ndiye bwenzi lawo lapamtima. Pano mungathe kuyankha chinthu chimodzi - muyenera kuganiza kale, pamene mnzanu adakokedwa mu bedi.
2. N'zovuta kumvetsera chinyengo, koma ndizofunikira. Zingakhale bwino kwa inu, ngati mukumvetsa chifukwa chake mwamuna adatsata mkazi wina. Kulankhula kwake momveka bwino kudzakuthandizani kuti muzichita "zolakwa".
3. Inde, kugulitsidwa kwa mwamuna sizotsatira chabe mitala ake (enieni ogonjetsa samangokwatira), ndi zolakwa zanu. Izi mwaleka kukhala zosangalatsa kwa iye, "zapilili", zojambulidwa ndi chisamaliro.
4. Popanda chikhululukiro cha kusunga ukwati, sipangakhale funso. Ngati simungaiwale cholakwa cha mwamuna wanu, ndiye kuti simungathe kukhala pamodzi.

Kodi mungatani kuti mukhale ndi chikondi m'banja?

1. Chisangalalo cha chisangalalo sichingakhale ndi nthawi yoti chichoke, monga momwe mungadzitetezere ndi nthawi zamakangano. Chinthu chachikulu sikuti awalole iwo awononge banja lanu - pazinthu zina zomwe okwatirana angakhale zosiyana, ndi zachilendo, anthu omwe ali ndi maganizo ofanana omwe sakhalapo. Ngati muli ndi malingaliro osiyana pa nthawi zazikulu za moyo, ndiye kuti banja silingakhale losangalala.
2. Mkazi, ndithudi, ayenera kuyang'ana bwino ndikukhala ndi nthawi, koma munthu aliyense amafunikira chisa chokoma. Ndipo ngati atabwerera kunyumba kuchokera kuntchito madzulo, mwamunayo angakumane ndi mkazi wake wokhwima ndi mazira ake, ndiye kuti posakhalitsa maonekedwe ake amatha kusangalatsa.
3. Pitani ku zovuta zina - woyang'anira woyera wa nyumba ya banja sangathe. Ngati simukuwona china chilichonse kusiyana ndi nkhawa zapakhomo, pakapita nthawi, kumvetsetsa mwamuna wanu wogwira ntchito kumakhala kovuta kwambiri. Mavuto a ntchito yake sadzadandaula, koma aliyense Kufika mochedwa kwa mwamuna kunyumba kudzaonekera mwa inu osati chifukwa cha ntchito kuntchito, koma ngati kusakhulupirika kwa mnzanuyo. Inu mudzakhala nkhuku-hen, yemwe mwa chikondi chake ndi chisamaliro chake adzamunyoza mwamuna wake, sadzamulola iye kuti apange sitepe imodzi yokha. Palibe yemwe angakhoze kulekerera malingaliro oterowo.
4. Muukwati, palibe amene amafunikira kanthu kwa wina aliyense. Mumakhala pamodzi chifukwa muli bwino kusiyana ndi nokha. Mukukonzekera chakudya cha mwamuna wanu, kubereka ana ake, ndipo chifukwa chake mumawabweretsa chifukwa mumafuna. Ndipo kotero amadzikuza yekha kuntchito, amayesa kupereka banja osati chifukwa cha ntchito yopatulika, koma chifukwa akufuna.