Nchifukwa chiyani amuna amakukopana?

Tsiku lililonse mumamva kuyamikila kuchokera kumagulu amphamvu, gwiritsani maonekedwe awo okongola. Komanso, ena a daredevils adzayesera kupereka zizindikiro za chidwi. Inde, mkazi aliyense amasangalala, koma kodi munayamba mwaganizapo chifukwa chake anthu amachitira nanu chikondi? Ngati kwa ife, atsikana, izi zimadzetsa kudzidalira ndikutsimikiziranso zokongola zake, ndiye ndi chiyani chowonekera kwa anyamata?

Kodi kutengeka kapena kukonda masewera olimbitsa thupi kumatanthauzanji?

Kugonana ndi njira yolankhulirana. Izi sizomwe zimangokhala zokondweretsa komanso sizikukondweretsa kugonana. Mwa kuyankhula kwina, mothandizidwa ndi mawu, mawonekedwe a nkhope, manja, munthu amene amachititsa kuti azichita bwino, amachititsa kuti azikhala ndi makhalidwe abwino. Ngati tikulankhula mwatsatanetsatane za lingaliro lomaliza, ndiye kuti zokhutiritsa zosowa za munthu. Monga momwe katswiri wamaganizo wotchuka Eric Berne analemba mu bukhu lake "Masewera omwe anthu amasewera," aliyense wa ife amafuna kutcheru ndi chikondi kuchokera kwa anthu ena, komanso pambali, ifeyo nthawi zina timakhala ndi chikhumbo chofuna kupatsa wina chikondi, chisamaliro ndi "stroking" imeneyi ndi yofunika kwambiri kwa munthu aliyense. Kubwereranso ku chikhalidwe cha kukwatira, timapeza kuti izi ndi njira yolankhulirana, maseŵera osakhwima omwe angabweretse chisangalalo kwa onse awiri.

Ndikofunika kuzindikira kuti kukopa sikumayesayesa, pa nkhaniyi ndi amuna, sikutheka kukokera mkazi kugona. Ngati ndi choncho, ndiye kuti tikulimbana ndi galimoto, ndipo izi ndizosiyana kwambiri.

Nchifukwa chiyani amuna amakukopana ndi ena?

Kodi ndinganene chiyani, koma amayi ambiri amafuna kumvetsetsa zachiwerewere. Mnyamatayo atangoyesa kukuyang'ana maso, akuwongolera, akumwetulira, choncho amayesa kukopa. Chinthu chochititsa chidwi kwambiri ndi chakuti, pakukangana, anyamata onse amachita zomwezo.

Kotero, amuna ambiri, ngakhale okwatira, samangokhala ngati iwo, amakonda, amanyengerera kukondana ndi aliyense. Amakonda kusonyeza luso lawo, nzeru zawo, charisma ndipo, ndithudi, chithumwa pazomwe akulankhulana ndi mtsikanayo. Komanso, atakhazikitsidwa, kulankhulana kotereku kumakhala kovuta. Choncho, achinyamata amayesetsa kusonyeza chidwi chawo. Kwa amuna, kukondana ndi mtundu wa masewera, abambo amafuna kuti azimayi azisamalira. Iye ali ndi chidwi chokhala ndi chiyanjano ndi mkazi malinga ngati iye ndi buku lotsekedwa lotsekedwa ndi zinsinsi ndi zinsinsi.

Komabe, ngati mukukumba mozama, timaphunzira kuti chizoloŵezi chochita masewera olimbitsa thupi ndi amayi onse ozungulira ndi chikhumbo chodzaza chosowa chamkati, kuwonjezera kudzidalira kwawo. Koma njira iyi yothetsera mavuto a anthu poyamba ndikutayika. Pokhazikitsa kuthetsa mavuto awo, pokonzekera bwino kulumikizana kwa mimba, munthu akhoza kukhala munthu wodzikhutira, ndalama komanso umoyo wabwino, kudzidalira yekha ndi zolinga zake.

Nanga bwanji ngati mwamuna akulumikizana ndi ena?

Mmene mungasungire chimwemwe cha banja, malingaliro apamtima kwa mnzanuyo, pamene simukudziwa, koma mumadziwitsanso nokha mmene wodalitsika amachitira ndi ena. Zikatero ndizofunika kumvetsera zotsatirazi:

1. Kupambana kwa ubalewu, kumalo oyamba, kumadalira khalidwe lachikazi, choncho sikofunikira kukonzekera zolakwa za wokondedwa ndikupangitsa mdani wake kuchoka.
2. Musaiwale kuti kumbuyo kwa munthu wamphamvu ndi mkazi wachikondi. Yesetsani kumvetsetsa mbali zake zoipa zomwe akuyesera kuti azikonzeketsa kukonda ena.
3. Ndipo mwina mwasiya kudzisamalira nokha? Tsiku lililonse mumakumana naye kuchokera kuntchito chimodzimodzi ndipo simunasinthe kalembedwe ka tsitsi lanu kwa nthawi yayitali? Taganizani za izo.