Pali mitundu yambiri yogonjera, koma cholinga chake ndi kukakamiza munthu kuchita zofunikira pazinthu zake. Nthawi zina "wogwidwa" amayesetsa kukana, ndipo nthawi zina amavomereza ndi wonyenga, chifukwa amakayikira kuti zomwe zikuchitikazo ndizokwanira. Chodabwitsa ichi chimatchedwa kutentha.
Gazlayting - ichi ndi chiani?
M'zaka makumi asanu ndi limodzi za m'ma 1900, lingaliro lomwe limatanthauza kusokoneza ndi kuzindikira kwa anthu ena zokhudzana ndi zenizeni za dziko lozungulira iwo zakhala zowonjezera. Ikubwereranso ku mutu wa filimu "Gas Light" (Gas Light) yochokera ku Patrick Hamilton "Street of the Angel" play (1938). Zaka 30 mutatulutsidwa chithunzicho, Florence Rush wa ku America adasindikiza buku lakuti "Chinsinsi chokhwima kwambiri: kugwiriridwa kwa ana", zomwe zinalongosola mwachidule zokhudzana ndi maganizo omwe akufotokozedwa mu filimu ya George Cukor.
Mwachidziwikire, kupsa mtima ndi mtundu wa nkhanza za m'maganizo momwe munthu mmodzi amayesera kupondereza wopondereza wake. Pogwiritsa ntchito chidziwitso chake, amachititsa kuti azitsatira:
- kukayika mu kukumbukira kwanu;
- kuganizira zomwe si zoona;
- cholungamitsa;
- kukayikira zowona zomwe zikuchitika ndi kukwaniritsa kwake;
- kuganiza kuti iye anasuntha ndi malingaliro.
Mitundu yachinyengo - kuyatsa
Kuwonetsa chidziwitso cha munthu wina ndikumukakamiza kutenga malingaliro omwe angafunike kungakhale kudzera mu njira zamakhalidwe ndi zoyankhula. Pomalizira pake, interlocutor (yemwe ndi wozunzidwa, yemwe zotsatira zake zimatsogoleredwa) adzalingalira ndi kuchita monga woyang'anira woyenera. Njira yawo yonyenga kwambiri ndi kuwala kwa dzuwa, chifukwa kumapotoza lingaliro lenileni. Ndimodzi yekha molimba mtima ananena mawu a mdaniyo "Panalibenso zoterozo!" Zimatsutsa chikhulupiriro cha womulankhulana mwa iyemwini. Woyambitsa mphamvu:
- molimba mtima amakana mfundo zomwe ziri zofunika kwa wotsutsana naye;
- amasonyeza kuti sitingadziwe kuti ndi ndani, kaya ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi, zaka, thupi lake.
Kubala pakati pa okwatirana
Kwa njira zachiwawa pamaganizo omwe nthawi zambiri amagwiritsa ntchito olemba mbiri, anthu omwe amaganiza zachipongwe, olankhula zabodza. Anthu oterewa bodza lamatsenga kwa ena, kutsimikizira kuti malingaliro awo ndi oona okha. Ndiponso, "zovomerezeka zoletsedwa" zingagwiritsidwe ntchito ndi mabanja, makamaka omwe amavomereza chiwawa. Pambuyo pa kukangana ndi chiwawa, mbali imodzi (yowala) idzakana mwakayesayesa kulakwitsa kwake. Ngakhale osadziŵa kuti kuli bwanji, olamulira achipembedzo akupitiriza kuigwiritsa ntchito bwino.
Chiwawa cha m'mudzi ndi chachilendo m'mabuku amakono. Nthawi zambiri anthu omwe amazunzidwa ndi omwe amaimira anthu omwe ali ndi chiwopsezo chofooka, ngakhale kuti sichidziwika bwino chifukwa chake amuna amagwiritsa ntchito Gazlayter. Poyamba, wogwidwayo sakudziwa kuti kusokonezeka kumachitika mu khalidwe la interlocutor. Koma pang'onopang'ono akuyamba kukayikira kukhala wokwanira ndikuvomerezana ndi mawu a wachiwawa.
Kugawa kwa ana
Chiwawa cha maganizo chikhoza kuchitika muubwenzi wa ana, kuyambira kwa ana komanso achibale awo akuluakulu. Zitsanzo za kunyengerera kwapakhomo:
- Ngati mayi kapena bambo amamuuza mwana wake kuti sali woyenera ndipo amachita zonse "osati momwe ziyenera kukhalira."
- Mwanayo amadziwika kuti sangathe kusintha chifukwa cha msinkhu wake: ali wamng'ono ndipo sangathe kusankha yekha, kupereka uphungu, kutsutsana ndi akulu, ndi zina zotero.
- Amayi ndi abambo amatsutsa chiwawa m'banja .
- Ngati mwana wamkulu amachititsa makolo kukayikira zomwe akukumbukira ("Ndinakuuzani (a), simukukumbukira?"), Ichi ndi chitsanzo cha gasi.
Mpweya wamba umapangitsa munthu kukhala wosadziletsa komanso wocheperachepera, ndipo amalepheretsa makhalidwe ake. Ntchito yaikulu ndikukhala ndi mphamvu zonse payekha komanso kuteteza zolakwika zanu. Mosiyana ndi akuluakulu, zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kuti mwana athe kutsutsa munthu, samadziwa ngakhale pang'ono kuti akukumana ndi chiwawa komanso sangathe kuthawa. Zotsatira zake ndizochepa kudzidalira komanso psyche yosweka.
Gazlayting kuntchito
Dongosolo la akatswiri limagweranso kumalo oopsya a chiwawa cha maganizo. Ogwira ntchito kumadera onse nthawi zonse amachitiridwa nkhanza ndi abwana awo, omwe amawachititsa manyazi ndi kuwatsogolera kuzinyozetsa. Popanda kudziwa kuwala, mtsogoleri amatha kufuula munthu wina, akuyitanitsa chirichonse chosayenera ndi kuopseza pothamangitsidwa. Ndipo wogwira ntchitoyo amayesetsa bwino ntchito zake. Wogwiritsira ntchito wamkulu amagwiritsa ntchito njira ya "karoti ndi kumira", ndiko kuti, njira yachiwiri:
- Choyamba iye akuwonetsa pansi pa zonse zopanda pake ndi wopusa.
- Ndiye akunena kuti "amamvetsa zonse."
Kodi galasi lingakonde?
Gaziter ndi munthu wamba amene ali ndi zofuna zake ndi zofooka zake, ngakhale kuti amagwiritsidwa ntchito poika maganizo ndi kusokoneza ena. Anthu amene anakumana ndi mdani wotero m'moyo weniweni sangathe kulimbana ndi mikangano yomwe ikuchitika. Ndizovuta kwambiri m'banja. Funso lalikulu limene limakondweretsa partner gazlaytera: kodi angakonde? Kuwonjezera apo, wogwiritsira ntchitoyo amadzikonda yekha, koma palibe munthu yemwe ali mlendo kwa iye. Nthawi zina zochita zake sizikhala zowawa . M'malo mozembera ndi kunyalanyaza, mungathe kuwonjezera chidwi, koma chikondi choterocho sichidzakhala chowona mtima.
Gazlayting - momwe mungakanire?
Gazlayt ndi mgwirizano wa mtundu wapadera womwe nthawi zonse umakhala pakati pa anthu oyandikana nawo kapena omwe amakhala pafupi (ogwira nawo ntchito, anzanu akusukulu, oyandikana nawo, ndi zina zotero). Pofuna kupewa kugwiritsidwa ntchito, mukhoza kuyesa kuchita izi:
- Ngati n'kotheka, lekani kuyanjana ndi wachiwawa kapena kuchepetsa.
- Khalani odzidalira, mphamvu zanu, zokwanira.
- Pamene mukulimbana ndi chikumbutso choipa, kotero kuti palibe kukayikira, lembani mfundo zonse zofunika mu bukhu kapena pa cholemba.
- Musamatsogolere pazinyenga ndi kupusitsa. Ngati zokambirana zikupita kumsewu wosafunikira, zikani.
Mafilimu okhudza kuwala
Ngati pangakhale kukayikira kuti kuvulaza kukuchitika kwa munthu, chochita chiyani kuti mudziwe zambiri za izo? Njira zowonongeka maganizo ndi kugwiritsidwa ntchito kwa "kulowetsa zenizeni" zili ndi zithunzi zoyendetsera mitundu yosiyanasiyana. Kuwonjezera pa tepi yapamwamba "Gasi Kuwala" (1944), yomwe inapatsa dzina kutentha dzina, awa ndi awa:
- "Rebecca" , 1940. Chokondweretsa Hitchcock chokhudza mkazi yemwe akuyendetsa galimoto pang'onopang'ono pang'onopang'ono.
- "Mngelo wa pamsewu" , 1940. Chithunzi choyamba cha Hamilton.
- "Dogville" , 2003. Imodzi mwa mafilimu otchuka kwambiri okhudza maganizo.
- "Mwana wa Rosemary" , 1968. Chikoka cha Polanski chokondweretsa chimakhudza aliyense mu "zosiyana".
- "Duplex" , 2003. Wosangalatsa za Gogo, yemwe akuyendetsa anthu openga atsopano.