Mungaiwale bwanji wokondedwa wanu?

Nthawi zina moyo sungadziwike, ndipo, paseĊµero lathu, mosayembekezereka kwa ife, amasintha ndondomeko ya anthu otchuka. Zikuwoneka kuti dzulo mwamuna wanu wokondedwa akukuyang'anirani mokhulupirika, atalonjezedwa kukonda masiku ake ena onse, koma momwe mungaiwale tsopano kuti ndinu mkazi wotayika. N'kutheka kuti tsopano simukudziwa kumene mungapeze mphamvu, kukhala ndi moyo, kukhazikitsa ndi kukonda wina. Ndipo chinthu chovuta kwambiri kuti muzimvetse ndicho chimene chiyenera kuchitika kuti muiwale munthu yemwe wathandizana naye kwambiri.

Moyo umapitirira

Ndi kupusa kukana kuti kuchoka kwa chikondi, kuchoka ndi wokonda, kumapweteka kwambiri pamaganizo a munthu. Zimatha kwa nthawi yaitali, miyezi, zaka kuti zisokoneze chimwemwe, chikondi, kutsekemera ndi mitundu yowala kwambiri. Koma ndibwino kukumbukira kuti pali chiwembu chomwe chimathandiza kuthana ndi vuto la kupatukana. Timakulangizani malangizo a katswiri wa zamaganizo omwe angakuthandizeni kutsegula mpweya wanu wachiwiri, ndipo mudzamvetsetsa momwe mungaiwale munthu wokondedwa wanu.

  1. Freud analemba kuti ndikofunikira "kuchotsa mphamvu zamaganizo kuchokera kwa wokondedwa, koma tsopano chinthu chotayika." Koma sizingatheke kuti tuluke m'nyanjayi ya zokhumudwitsa ndi chisoni, popanda kudziperekera ku mafunde osokonezeka. Choncho, Mutu # 1 pa njira yopita ku moyo wabwino popanda iye, wokondedwa wanu, ndikumadzipangitsa kukhala wokhumudwa, kumva chisoni, kukumbukira zabwino kwambiri ndi zoyipa zomwe zinali pakati pa inu. Kumbukirani zonse zomwe iwo akufuna kunena, koma iwo sanachite mantha. Ndikhulupirire, ndi bwino kumasula maganizo anu m'malo mobisala kwinakwake pozama. Posakhalitsa iwo amadzimverera okha, koma zikhoza kuchitika kuti maonekedwe awa sakhala pa nthawi.
  2. "Kodi mungaiwale bwanji mwamuna atatha kupatukana, makamaka ngati sanamvepo mtima?" - Funsoli limapereka chiwerengero chachikulu cha amai. Koma nthawi zonse kumakhala kuwala kumapeto kwa msewu, mulimonsemo pali kutuluka. Chifukwa chake, pamene kukongola koyamba kwa chikondi kumachotsedwa, khalani opanda nkhanza ndikumasuka nokha ku zithunzi zonse, zomwe zinali zake. Ngati mwapadera dzanja silidzuka kuti liwononge zonsezi, liyikeni ndi kutumiza zonse kwa yemwe anathetsa ubale wanu. Dzikani nokha kuti mupite kumasamba ake achikhalidwe. Chotsani kugwirizana ndi anzanu omwe mumawadziwa. Palibe chitsimikizo kuti izi zidzapatsidwa kwa inu mosavuta. Koma, ndikukhulupirirani, pamene kugwirizana ndi mfundo zakuthupi za kukumbukira kwanu poyamba kukonda, mudzakhala wokonzeka kupitiriza kukhala ndi njira yatsopano.
  3. Akatswiri a zamaganizo amanena za gawo lachitatu lamasulidwe kuchokera kumaganizo akale ndi maganizo, gawo la "Kupatukana." Ichi ndi chifukwa chakuti kuyambira tsopano mpaka mu malingaliro anu pali mitsinje iwiri ya moyo - imodzi yomwe inali ndi yomwe mumakonda komanso yamakono, popanda. Kamodzi kanthawi inu, zodabwitsa kwa inu nokha, mukumvetsa kuti mungathe popanda kupweteka mumtima mwanu, penyani kumbuyo. Pamene izi zichitika, simudzakhalanso msilikali wamkulu wa kale, koma wongowang'anitsitsa, wosunga zochitika. Koma osakhalanso.
  4. Sikutchulidwa kuti mutha kulingalira zosankha monga "Ndipo ngati ndikumuitanabe?". Kutaya "ngati-mwadzidzidzi." Thawani kutali ndi iwo. Musachiwonere icho. Pitirizani kupita patsogolo popanda kubwerera mmbuyo.

Ndikofunika kuzindikira kuti akatswiri a maganizo a alangizi amalimbikitsa kwambiri, atatha kuwonongeka kwakukulu, kupatukana kuti asamange ubale watsopano ndi cholinga chopangitsa mnzanuyo, tiye tilowe mu "pulasitala" ya ululu wanu wamaganizo. Maubale awa sadzakhala ndi mapeto osangalatsa. Mutha kuiwala mwamsanga munthu amene mumawakonda, koma mwamsanga mutalola kuti moyo ukhale wosangalala, sinkhasinkha zomwe zinachitika, phunzirani zambiri ndikukhala olimba. Chilichonse chimatenga nthawi. Koma musaiwale kuti munthu aliyense amafunika nthawi yosiyana kwa wina aliyense: wina kwa miyezi ingapo, ndipo munthu wokha pa chaka amamva ngati umunthu watsopano.